I know I have argued against the suitability of “unschooling” for our family in the past. But I must confess, it is calling to me again. Perhaps there is just something about springtime, or else it is watching my child getting boxed into smaller and smaller bits of herself and feeling very unhappy about that. Where is the girl who was always busy, always asking questions? Where is the mother, for that matter, who could put things down to answer those questions or assist in the looking-up of answers? It has been months since Rose spent the day reading a good book. I can’t even remember the last time she lost herself in crafting.
And yet, I am hesitant to throw away all my control, because I do believe a parent should be a wise guide and make the important decisions. I like Melissa Wiley’s description of tidal homeschooling. Perhaps this is what fits us. Or it could be that where we are heading has no title or a set description or a Method, if only because I need to escape from boxes.
What has inspired me most lately is this quote from my own sidebar : We live a peaceful life beneath old dark hills, reading antique books, tramping around in the wild, and catching up on the great conversation of the ages. That sums up my ideal vision of our homeschool. I don’t aspire to anything else. Oh, I should include Rose’s self-education in the arts. And the stories we create. And maths, of course; I am not skilled enough in that subject to confidently leave it to unschooling. But basically, I have this dream of a warm, gentle existence in which we read interesting things and talk about them and learn more if we want to, and Rose grows into being a soulful, fulfilled person regardless of what job she ends up doing. (It seems to me that the main focus of education these days is Getting A Good Job. What about Becoming A Happy, Balanced Person? Isn’t there more to contribute to society than just what you can provide the economy?)
It is scary to think like this, especially considering I come from a family of school teachers who are very proud of their own children’s private school educations. I feel the compulsion to Keep Up with them. But hold on, don’t they refuse to listen to me talk about homeschooling? Don’t they turn away when it even looks like I might mention Rose’s achievements? It’s rather silly to organise one’s homeschooling according to the opinions of people who don’t even care!
I think I should listen to my student, who “can’t see the point” of my clever wonderful unit study to create a kingdom. She might need my prodding to do maths, but in all other aspects I must recognise she has proven incredibly wise about what is a good education for her. And she’s learned more over the years that what I could ever teach her. The child will teach herself huge, amazing, profound, mind-boggling things, if left to it. What am earth am I doing sitting her down to make neat little narrations and pretty headers?
If you asked me what I wanted most to achieve with my child – a happy adult or an intellectual and successful adult – I would have to answer most truly that I’d aim for both. And I’d tell you that probably a thorough education which really polished up her excellent mind would be the most benefit to that adult.
BUT I am not raising an adult. I am raising a child who will eventually (please God) become an adult. So, first things first.
